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17, I fall on 23 feb, year by year Archive
» November 2009Credits
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4'NEL. Saturday, November 7, 2009 Dear you, Times haven't been easy all this while. On the 4th this month we broke off. I thought saying things mean, you just leave and don't come back, I wanted to make you hate me at the point of time so that I can forget you quick. I didn't want you to care. But you said, you wanted me to stay over and asked me to wait for you just under you block. You didn't turn up. It's okay. I thought this is the end, I wanted to leave but I suddenly thought of you, I dial your number. Again, you asked me to meet you this time somewhere else. At that point of time, honestly I was in doubt. I didn't know if I should. But I still proceed. Met you outside Crystal, alone. When I was on the way down, I told myself, I've to be strong. I promised you when I was at your place. I didn't know what were you up to. But the reason I didn't react to your words is because, you made me felt so neutral the day before. Those mean words you shouted through the phone, I lost myself totally, I didn't utter a word, I kept silent. Because, I was so scared of you. Until you told me, "我今天做工时, 想了很多, 想我不能没有你". You thought I'd tear. But I was too neutral at that time, all I thought was; If you love me, why left me waiting alone. If you love me, why would you say things that are so hurting. But I swear before this incident took place, I didn't expect to play such a important role in your life. One, that could actually make you tear from night to day for me. I am sorry for the disappointment I gave you all these years. I, thank you for all the love you gave me these years. Ever since that day, 4th - 6th Nov living with you, everytime I thought of the things you told me, I am the one you dote on most, I am the one you ever spent so much time on, I am the one you did so much for. Everytime I think 'bout it, tears flow down. I don't know, if you knew how much I loved you. Every morning, when I wake up the first thing I told myself is, I used to hope time could go back, so I undo the wrong things that I've done but I know that it's no such thing in reality therefore, I learnt from everything, every mistake I did, I grow with them, I remember but never repeat them. Although I cannot undo hurts and disappoint I once gave. But I can do it vice-versa in future. I must cherish you, cherish every chance you give to me. Again, if it's not that incident I wouldn't know you love me so much. Heart4u. Sincerely yours, Pearlyn on 7th Nov 2009. | |